Tuesday, March 1, 2016

It's 8:14 in the morning and she has a drink in her hand

Just had a breakfast date with a hot The Gorgeous Blonde. How is your day so far?

Can you do me a smedium favor?

Sure. What is it?

Scan some stuff and email it to me. 

Don't you have a scanner at work?

It's new and nobody knows how to use it yet. 

... smiles and takes the papers she needs scanned without saying a word.

New furniture arrives today.

It's odd, I hear ambulances at least twice a day and with the high number of old people around here I know some of those are sirens are for dead people. I can confirm this because there are estate sales literally every single weekend. Usually more than one.

My point is, we could probably have gotten our living room suite a lot cheaper if we just waited til the right old person died. But then we'd have a cranky old person ghost living with us so, nevermind.

It's time for my pudding!

You're dead, old dude. You can't eat pudding anymore. 

I can still smell it, dammit!

Smell this, *fart*

*studio audience laughs*

And that, boys and girls, is my new sitcom Deadpa and Me. Watch for it on Netflix.

Titty sprinkles!

Sofa for sale. Dog included.
I stumbled onto this from a friend's page this morning. It's awesome.