Wednesday, January 20, 2016

The world deserves more Rikis and more Kates

I am wrapped in a blanket and shivering. It is 68 degrees in this house, you guys!

Sarah Palin's boobs are back! That's my big take away from her endorsement of the asshat. I can see that rack from my house.

I have been contemplating quitting comedy altogether. I haven't been on the road in forever, haven't been in front of an audience in months and have become fat and happy. I'm working on the fat part. Thinking about working on a boat in the sea. I would love to be a pirate but, they aren't hiring anymore. I dunno, I haven't decided.

I've always believed we can be any and all of the selves we want.

Jesus fuck that sounded like some new agey bullshit.

I got a message yesterday from TGB on a beach in Jamaica yesterday. I was on the beach here at home. It was a Twilight Zone moment. Frankly, my beach was nicer. Her beach had drinks brought to her by Nubian Princes. I think she wins.

Titty sprinkles!