Saturday, January 9, 2016

Honey, I think she's having a seizure. No, she's just dancing.

We have this *not so* mildly racist game we play. We call it Your People. It's one of the perks of being in an interracial marriage.

Here are the rules: You laugh at your spouse anytime someone of his/her race does or says something incredibly stupid.

ex: anytime Donald Trump appears on my television I lean over to TGB and whisper, your people. Point for Rudy. Anytime Marco Rubio or Rafael Cruz Sr or Jr show up on my television TGB leans in and whispers, your people. Point TGB. Then we change the channel away from FOX News because science has demonstrated that too much exposure to FNC will, in fact, make you dumber.

Obviously, you can play this game with people of the same race. For example, I could hang out with my brother Anthony who looks every bit the thug and we could catch an episode of Cops be in La Puente, or whatever, where some cholo is getting arrested. At that point I could lean and whisper, your people. Marco Rubio or Rafael Cruz Sr or Jr... you get the idea.

Also, nobody gets a point for Cheech because he is pure fucking awesomeness and you only get points for embarrassments. George Lopez for example. Seriously, when you kill a kidney and are blessed with a new one, maybe stop fucking drinking, puto!

Sorry, he needed some tough love.

Fun fact, swap out my brother with TGB in the above scenario and suddenly she gets the point for the vato getting arrested.

Where was I?

The South. Living in The South has made this game less fun for TGB. Which is weird cause I love it more than I ever have. The game, not The South. I came home from date night last night with an almost insurmountable lead. At least, until the next time we visit California.

In the day and age of microaggression microbutthurt this game is a refreshing middle finger to all the hypersensitive bullshit in this world. Play it with a friend or loved one. Do not play it with people you don't know very, very well. I don't want you getting shanked or shot and then blaming me.

Titty sprinkles!

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