Monday, July 13, 2015

Put your left leg down your right leg up

Home from Kentucky.

Is it a coincidence that my wife has non-overbearing, loving, normal parents and also happens to be the least batshit crazy woman I have ever been involved with? By least batshit crazy I mean, not at all crazy. I think the two things are somehow connected. Just a hunch.

Checked my FB this morning and the first thing I saw was a friend lost a friend named Gus. I didn't know Gus, but I empathise with anyone losing a loved one and scrolled the comments to leave a virtual hug. Then I realized, via the comments, that Gus was a dog.

This stopped my scroll and sent my heart racing.

Look, I am not the guy who thinks dogs are people or that they're more important than people, or whatever other nonsense people tell themselves when they have better relationships with animals than people. But I do know that dogs have a soul and, for the most part, they love relentlessly (unless until their doggy ADD kicks in).

Who doesn't love Gus?

So I scrolled down her page to see if I could find a picture of Gus. He was a beautiful old guy. I think you would have liked him. Ever meet a Gus you didn't like? No. Because once your name is Gus you are automatically part of an elite group of guys who everyone just likes because Guses kick ass. Gus always has your back, makes you laugh, and knows when to shut the fuck up and just let you be without nagging you incessantly. Sure, sometimes Gus drinks a little too much too fast and ends up puking on his own feet just to drink more because Guses are also kinda gross, but that's part of their charm.

But mostly I caught myself thinking, there is nothing better than a dog when you're sad. They really are the best tear absorber. Which really is a sad irony in this case.

Also, if there really is a heaven, I want to go to the dog park part of it because dogs are way cooler than people.