Monday, June 29, 2015

Title goes here

When Rupert Murdoch is on his deathbed, I half expect him to pull off his Murdoch mask Scooby Doo style and out will pop Ashton Kutcher. That's the only way the existence of FOX News makes sense.

I feel moderately successful whenever a troll comes a calling. However, I would like it if trolls could come up with something original and funny instead of the usual go back to Mexico crap. That's right up there with puns on the scale of funny. Yep, every time you use  a pun, you're telling me to go back to Mexico. You fucking racist.

I sing sea shanties now.

Marriage existed long before whatever god you believe in did. In fact, gods have lived and died long before your god even existed.

SCOTUS just shot down Obama's air pollution limits. Damn judges legislating from the bench!

That was sarcasm.

This is my toast. No, you may not have some.
Whenever an uptight homophobe in government gets caught sucking dick no one is ever surprised. I would go so far as to say that the louder someone screams about the evil of gaiety (the best four words I have ever typed) we expect to find out that said individual is a raging, closeted, queen. Well, as I sat on the shitter thinking about that fact about a minute ago it occurred to me that the old testament is chock full of homophobia and, what with it being the literal word of god, it kinda made me wonder. I'm pretty sure I'm right.