Sunday, June 21, 2015

The most heartwarming post to date

Do you think George Lucas made Darth Vader a black, deadbeat dad because he's a racist? Just me then? Okay.

I know nerdy friends, he is white. I saw the shitty prequels, too. Lighten up, dipshits.

Father's Day is one of those, oh, thanks for reminding me to show some fucking gratitude and love holidays. It's right up there with Valentine's and Mother's Day. I love my dad. He knew that when he was alive. I went through the trouble of getting the man Mother's Day cards, dammit.

Big Rudy had the fashion sense of a drunk monkey.
Wanna show your dad you love him? Call him on a Tuesday evening and don't ask for anything. Just tell him, hey old man, I love you and I'm glad mom let you fuck her. It'll catch him off guard and make him laugh.

I'm teaching you how to be a better child. You're welcome.

Every time I look at the above picture I have to wonder how my old man got laid at least six times in his life. Then I remember he had a HUGE dick. My mom told me. The moral: big dick + awful fashion sense = more sex than your ugly ass is having. You gonna cry now?

I can't stop watching this. Share it just to annoy your friends.