Wednesday, June 3, 2015

Stop being an asshole. That's my job.

Apparently Akon did a cool thing yesterday. Also apparently, the only way for people to share it on social media was through a meme that, while pointing out this awesome thing he did, also called Caitlyn Jenner a science experiment.

Which sucked.

Not merely because it needlessly shat on one human being in order to lift up another. It sucked because I was eager to share what Akon did until I got to the the science experiment part. So I said, fuck this and went to bed. Some assholes just want to pick a fight when there isn't even a fight to be had.

That's been on my mind since last night. People fucking bug me. People should be more like Dexter who is, at this very moment, trying to catch a fly. Oh, wait, now he's trying to catch his tail. And now he's just staring at me looking confused after having been outsmarted by a fly and a tail. Still smarter than most people.

If you look closely, you can see the fly taunting Dexter.
I woke up with a song in my head. I could not remember the name of it, just random lyrics. Not even in any particular order. So I just spent an inordinate amount of time trying to find it. It's a beautiful song that I think you will like so don't just ignore it this time.

You were a single red blood cell but I lost you in the knot of capillaries