Monday, August 18, 2014

There's beauty in the breakdown

I don't want to die, I'm just not afraid of it. That was my first thought this morning. It's a thought I have a lot. I don't really know why, I just do. Even when I was a kid. Death has always felt like this thing blocking my view of something awesome.

I warned you a long time ago that I (usually) start writing this before I've even had my first cup of coffee.

When I was a kid I spent a lot of time alone. I read a lot and wrote a lot. Even as a very young kid I loved reading about WWII. So one day, left to my own devices, I wrote a series of letters back and forth between Hitler and FDR as I imagined they would sound.

My dad found them and freaked the fuck out. He called my Uncle Charlie and we had a full on intervention. At the time, my nine year old mind equated my writing with misbehaving; I thought I had done something wrong. Whereas my dad was reacting to some pretty graphic writings about death and genocide from his nine year old.

I was a weird kid. I also didn't write for a very long time after that.

Here, have a cute puppy to calm your nerves:

 You want to squeeze me and make annoying baby sounds. I want to eat your face in your sleep.

Happy Monday. Dickhead.