Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Made love to my pillow but it didn't feel right

When I was a little boy my Nana (gramma on my mom's side) would often call me tonto. That's Spanish for someone who is basically a moron. Before you go feeling sorry for me for being on the receiving end of some sort of verbal and emotional abuse, my Nana only ever called me that when I was displaying moronic behavior.

Oh, so she only called you that when you were awake.

Ha-ha, fuckers.

So the first time I saw The Lone Ranger I was more than a little surprised when the dark skinned guy introduced himself as, me tonto.

Let's make the dark skinned guy say, hi, I'm fucktard/moron/stupid/imbecile!

My little brain didn't know much, but it knew enough to know that I was watching some bullshit.

I'm looking at you, Dan Snyder.

I miss my wife. I miss her in my bed making the cute little noises she makes through the night. I miss her leaving me a sliver of blanket. I miss watching her get ready in the morning. I miss my wife.

My coffee is getting cold.