Remember the first time you got caught masturbating? So fucking embarrassing. Remember the added thrill thereafter at the threat of being caught? No? Just me? Huh. Maybe mom was right about me.
My face is still stuck like that
I think about masturbation a lot more than I actually do it anymore. My right forearm is starting to atrophy back to the point that I almost have a matching set. I guess I'm happy about that.
I still enjoy sex. It's just that I would rather play video games than masturbate. It's like I'm tired of me.
It's not me, it's me. I stopped pleasing me.
The thing about video games is that you use your thumb a lot. Thumbs are vital to healthy sex. With a woman at least. If you don't understand why, you probably have a less than satisfied lover at home. So play more video games. Then google clitoris stimulation. You're welcome.
I don't even know why the fuck I talk to you people.
Coffee. Must. Have.