Friday, April 25, 2014

Rolling in the derpppppppppp!

How excited are the idiot politicians who supported Cliven Bundy right now? Specifically the ones up for mid-term re-election. This is going to be fun!

Cliven, you make me proud to be a 'Murcan!

When I say Cliven, you say Clavin. Cliven...

It's going to rain tonight in LA. That means the apocolypse could happen and the news wouldn't have time to cover it. That's how big rain news is in these parts. People forget how to drive. The Red Cross gets sent out. People camp out to watch houses slide down hills. It's a pretty fucking awesome time. 

Everytime I see someone texting and driving I catch myself thinking horrible thoughts like I hope you end up with prostate cancer that renders you unable to have sex at the same time a supermodel asks you to take her home.

My mom says I shouldn't think that way. I think my mom should shut her dirty whore mouth. 

I need coffee.

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