Thursday, April 24, 2014

Apparently I am a fat ass

Fat ass is a medical term, right? I self diagnosed last night. I've been having weird shit going on with my health lately and diabetes runs in my family so I started googling.

Admit it, you said it in his voice.

Googling symptoms for any disease is never a good idea. Go ahead pick a disease, any disease. Now google it. Now you have it. And it will probably kill you. It's that simple. 

And while I am not ready to diagnose myself as a diabeetus having person, I am certain of my fatassery thanks to the BMI index.

I am all muscle under here. Waaaayyyyy down deep.

According to my BMI I need to lose 25 pounds to get back into the normal range and that's just barely within range. And since fatassery is a massive contributor to the onset of diabeetus it looks like I won't be eating anything delicious for a long, long time. 

Also, I have to figure out where the on switch is on the treadmill. 

I need coffee.